those fricking freakydeaky android chicks

in that new Heineken ad creep me the fuck out. i mean, the one chick with crazy roboto-arms pulls a mini beerkeg out of her insides, and then all of a sudden there are three of them! stop multiplying you cyborg freaks! ... i want to shout. they all proceed to start dancing unnervingly implicatively erotically, shaking their white white vaguely asiatic exceptionally well proportioned but clearly creepazoidal cyborg bodies at me and then of a sudden pouring out a frosty mug, all the while staring straight at me, the viewer, with an expression of such demon-affected pleasure that in attempting to seem however fuckable or come-hitherish some ad wizard surmised would be impactful, these freakydeaky android chicks in reality come across as unrepentant human-haters sent from the future on a mission of committing acts of violent murder upon as many impressionable drunkards as possible. seriously, what. the. fuck. that is not what i want from my mini keg commercial.

unrelated: i noticed yesterday that the giant purple head that was in golden gate park for awhile is no longer there. this made me sort of sad; nothing was left but the stain on the grass. i always loved it when i was in the park, and saw that giant purple head. it was always so giant. and purple.

hey: hyphy slang is awesome. i got graaaayypes! i got puuuurple!

i'm thinking a ghost riding a whip would be a great halloween costume. or a man with a giant purple head. or Ahmadinejad. (timely!) or Sigourney Weaver. (from Gorillas in the Mist!) or a freakydeaky android chick.

i can't decide.

the thing about being here is that you are always right




a picture of a sloth


funny animal group names

an ostentation of peacocks.
a shrewdness of apes.
a rhumba of rattlesnakes.
a mustering of storks.
a pandemonium of parrots.
a venue of vultures.
a smack of jellyfish.
a coalition of cheetahs.
a wisdom of wombats.
a business of ferrets.
a bloat of hippopotami.
an unkindness of ravens.
a parliament of owls.
a tower of giraffes.
a convocation of eagles.
a destruction of wildcats.
an ambush of tigers.
a mob of emus.
a crash of rhinoceroses.
an exultation of skylarks.
an implausibility of gnus.



the autumn days

the autumn days are coming, the time to
find a hoodie and a coffee cup, keep an open
invitation to dinner and drinks because dark
sooner than light, light eliding like fog surrounds
the city, the folk alive in mist and whispers, ninjas
and crooks and nannies and perceptions of the hardcore
avoiders of fate, mumblers who'll wait for the past
before believing tomorrow lies, all sit around
saying "can i borrow your disguise?"

the autumn days are coming, do you want
to listen to every theoretically present person
share again such wonderful insight at full length
when you are perhaps only hungry for perfect
humorous doom? superheroes and the criminal
underworld excessively engaging as a motif,
the ability of society to wear a costume
and fool itself into functioning happily
as a democracy will repeatedly do

the autumn days are coming, the time for
sleeping under a tree and dreaming of the
tale you would tell buddha if you met him
at your local where you'll meet friends later
and watch the game, what would you say
would he laugh i would think so but it would
have to be a good story and in your dream
it is



the metaverse

is coming. and this is a pretty amazing thing. i hate the word 'amazing', but i really mean it here. this thing is amaaayyyy-zing.

it's a new visualization technology called Photosynth: "a vastly powerful piece of software capable of taking a wide variety of images (for instance, Flickr images, taken by hundreds or thousands of different people), analyzing them for similarities, and grafting them together into an interactive three-dimensional space. This seamless patchwork of images can be viewed via multiple angles and magnifications, allowing us to look around corners or 'fly' in for a (much) closer look."

ok, ok. just take seven minutes of your life and watch the presentation, delivered by the creator of the software at TED2007.

it's the seeds of Neal Stephenson's metaverse, but, like, for real. (a) for real, and (b) imagine the implications, once video mapping becomes possible in the same way. a virtual world is only a matter time.

but how much time?


direct quote from Mystery, host of The Pick-up Artist, a reality show on VH1 about helping unconfident men learn how to meet and attract women

"I think we'll all agree that this is a lot more than just about picking up girls."